“Sacred Marriage”

Recently, I traveled to California to attend a leadership seminar that focused on Marital Enrichment as part of my academic pursuits at the King’s College and Seminary. The focus of this seminar was to offer a remedy to the epidemic of divorce within the Body of Christ. One of the textbooks used was a book written by Gary Thomas titled, “Sacred Marriage”. I am using this article to promote this book and suggest that everyone reading this should invest in their marriage and the marriages of their congregants by purchasing, reading and distributing “Sacred Marriage”.

The thesis of Thomas’ book can be summarized by a question posed in the opening chapter, “What if God designed marriage to make us holy more than to make us happy?” The remainder of the document builds upon this foundational question. It is Thomas’ contention that the marriage relationship is designed by God to be a training ground for spiritual development and maturity.

The framework offered, which underscores the possibility of spiritual growth and development within the context of the marriage covenant, constitutes Thomas’ unique contribution to the field of marriage enrichment. Using this premise as a guideline, Thomas examines the effectiveness of marriage in developing Christian disciplines such as; unconditional love, respect, prayer, perseverance, character, forgiveness, and service. It is the ability to frame spiritual growth and maturation within the marriage context that makes “Sacred Marriage” such an impacting and insightful text.

It is refreshing to read Thomas* bold assertion that marriage is not primarily about learning how to love one’s spouse but learning to love one’s God. Scores of biblical marriage manuals espouse the significance of God in the marriage covenant but they do not go as far as Thomas does to assert that marriage is the path to a deeper relationship with God. Many view God as a means to a deeper relationship with one’s spouse rather than seeing marriage as a means to a deeper relationship with one’s God. This seismic shift in priority establishes a right order of significance missing in much of the in much of the modern literature on biblical marriage.

The natural outflow of this shift in significance is a healthier marital relationship where spouses focus on developing a deeper relationship with God through their marriage. A marriage is truly mature when spouses “can use the challenges, joys, struggles and celebrations of marriage to draw closer to God and to grow in Christian character.”

Thomas observes, “If we view the marriage relationship as an opportunity to excel in love, it doesn’t matter how difficult the person is whom we are called to love; it doesn’t matter even whether that love is ever returned.” This approach certainly mirrors the love our God offers, while standing diametrically opposed to our “feel-good” culture.

In conclusion, the contents of “Sacred Marriage” are a revelation of God*s intended purpose for the marriage covenant. God has called each spouse to a high office in marriage, which is every bit as spiritual and consecrated as any office of the Church. Gary Thomas offers a solemn observation; “God does not regard his servants according to the dignity of the office they exercise, but according to the faithfulness with which they exercise it.” A renewed call to faithfulness, especially in the marriage context, would certainly benefit us all within the Body of Christ.